Thursday, September 3, 2009

Chainsaw Thursday: Rob Zombie's Halloween II

Happy First Chainsaw Thursday everybody! On Chainsaw Thursdays I will review a particularly gory/not psychological thriller film. Enjoy.

"Michael Myers is *fucking* dead. Want me to spell it out for you? D-E-A-D!"

But of course it wasn't that easy...

The story follows Michael Myers' sister, Lori Strode, after she wakes up (in the home of her adopted family) from a disturbing and realistic dream in which she's being chased by Myers, whilst he *brutally* kills everyone in his way. Throughout the film, we are taken back and fourth between scenes of Michael doin' his thing--killin' the shit out people, and Lori having disturbing dreams and hallucinations that she's killin' the shit out of people. Mind you, though, while she is tormented by this spectre, she has no idea that she's related to Myers. It's not until she stumbles upon a detailed biography on Michael Myers that her history is uncovered. After reading the book, she discovers her real name is Angel Myers ("Angel"--hmm...). She goes to her friend's house to seek solace but soon decides "Hey, fuck it!" and she and two other friends go to a Halloween party.

But hey, it's a horror film, so drunk teenagers are obviously gonna get they're asses butchered.
While at the party, Lori gets hammered, and while her one friend is about to get it on in a car with some kid in a wolf mask, they bite the dust at Michael's hands. Lori and her remaining friend soon decide that they should probably be heading home (unbeknownst to them their third buddy is dead in the back of a van). First they go to Lori's house, only to find that Lori's 'sister' Anna has been butchered and is barely alive (she dies within a matter of minutes). The friend is told by Lori to go call 911, but something has to go wrong, and she is killed as she is telling the 911 operator the address. Lori's adopted father (who is a cop) soon returns home to find Lori gone and Anna dead. Obviously disturbed and distraught over the death of his only biological child, he is still determined to find Lori and figure out just what the hell is going on.
But soon, the asshole writer of the Michael Myers biography (you know, the one that broke the news to Lori..I mean, Angel) shows up saying he wants to help. The cop gets his knickers in a twist and is all "get the fuck out of here, blah blah blah." Loomis, however (the writer) tags along anyways and when they go to an out-in-the-middle-of-nowhere location to find Lori, they discover that Michael Myers is with her.
"Holy Hell Batman! I thought you said he was D-E-A-D, DEAD!"
And that's what everyone seemed to think, but throughout the film we see images of him doing his thing, so we (the viewers) know that he obviously ain't dead!...
If you want to know the ending, tough shit. I know I gave away a good portion of the plot but the point of my reviews is so YOU (the reader) can make a choice of whether you want to go see it. I'm not going to tell you the end so you don't have to watch it.
Anyway, now for the point of my review: did I like it? Hell yeah, I'd say I liked it. The gore was EXTREMELY intense so, like Inglourious Basterds, not for those who get queasy easily. The gore can kind of distract one from the plot at times, so I guess that would be my only complaint. This was not a plotless horror flick, however. The plot was pretty intriguing, but the amount of gore was just, like I said, a little distracting. And pretty disgusting might I add. But it was a good time nonetheless. If you're looking to be scared, you'll be impressed. Before this one, I honestly can't remember the last "horror" movie that actually scared me. I can honestly say that I almost cried like a little bitch during one or two of the killing scenes (yes--it was that intense!). If you're into horror movies and you're one of those "the gorier, the better" people, then definitely go see it. If you're looking for a deep, psychologically unnerving thriller that will disturb you to the very depths of your soul, then skip this one. If I had to rate it using the "star" system (which I sort of hate), I would say seven out of ten because the gore/blood splatter/sound of people being stabbed in the back of the head was kind of repetitive and got annoying after a while. Some people said it was confusing, and I found myself *a little* confused at times, but that could possibly be just me being stupid. Other than that, no complaints. All in all, Halloween II pretty much kicked some serious ass. Go see it.